Sometimes the best place to start is OVER!

The Chattahoochee River
Well this is just what I did! After 20 years I am back home in Georgia! It feels so good to be home. I also made a trip to Alabama where I lived when I went to high school. Now that my fiend was 25 years ago! Wow was it really odd feeling to be there again and this time not in trouble of some sort. I have so much history in Alabama some I wish to forget and some that I never want to forget.

I have also been trampling around in some cemeteries! No I am not a morbid person although some do think I am. I just love to do Genealogy research and it led me to some old cemeteries. Wouldn't you know that it rained and stormed all day. I felt like I was running from tornadoes all day! Although non were spotted or reported.

I am not 41 days post-op and sometimes it is hard for me to remember that it has only been six weeks since my surgery so I have to slow myself down some. I find myself lifting and doing things that I should not be doing until week ten. My healing has come along so good that it is easy to forget. Until I get that little pain in my chest that reminds me.

Well Inanna my cat is for sure a queen. She should be having her kitten on or before May the ninth. She is being a nightmare to get along with. I assume it is hormonal just like humans go through. She is being so picky about her food. She no longer likes what she has been eating her entire life so we are having to experiment on different cat food to find something she likes. Mostly it seems she wants human food which I know is not the right kind of food for her.

Well I will blog more later! Bye folks!!

Read more...

Day 24

Well it has been a while since I have blogged but I have went back to work and I have had a hard time getting readjusted to working. I did not realize how my range of motion had been impeded with my surgery. The scars still feel really tight as in when I lift my arm I can feel the pull near the incision site. As a manager my work week consist of 6 days. So I went back this week and I stayed home only one of those days when I had a lot of swelling going on.

Most of my steri-strips are gone now. I have about a two inch strip left on my left side that I have been a little nervous about trying to remove. I keep reading that I should let them just fall off. I had to coerce mine into coming off because on day 21 they still acted as if that had no plans of ever coming off.

I went back to work two weeks after my surgery. Honestly for having a total mastectomy I think that was to soon. The first day I went I had major soreness and lots of swelling. I put my Ace Bandage back and put ice on it and that helped. So now I am afraid to go to work without my Ace Bandage on. So I think I will just wear this thing until most of the tenderness is gone. Personally I would recommend that one should wait at least four weeks to insure that they are through the rough spots. I would have but my doctor said it was okay for me to go back. So my job expects me to do what my doctor thinks is best.

Read more...

Obama appoints transgendered as Advisor

Looks like President Obama is holding true to his slogan "Yes we can"! I have been so proud of what he has accomplished. If we can get past the fact that he walked into a White House that was already broke. He has tried to make some changes and what is making most so mad is that he is doing this for the little people. I don't like to discuss politics so I will stop at it here.

Amanda Simpson, 49, is a member of the National Center for Transgender Equality board of directors, and is taking over the spot as the Senior Technical Advisor in the Bureau of Industry and Security. On December 31st, Simpson was quoted in a statement hoping that her appointment will open doors for other transgender people:

Ms. Simpson has thirty years of experience in the aerospace and defense industry. She recently served as Deputy Director in Missile Systems in Tuscon, Arizona. She holds degrees in physics, engineering, and business administration. She is a certified flight instructor and test pilot.

“I’m truly honored to have received this appointment and am eager and excited about this opportunity that is before me,” said Simpson, in a prepared statement released by Transgender Equality on Dec. 31. “And at the same time, as one of the first transgender presidential appointees to the federal government,” she said, “I hope that I will soon be one of hundreds, and that this appointment opens future opportunities for many others.”

Amanda Simpson you truly inspire me!

Read more...

Day 15

I have about 30 more minutes and it will be the start of day 16. I will have to say I have been very lucky with my recovery. To date I have not had any complications. Maybe a good bit of pain because I do not like taking strong pain medication. Most of my pain management has been with Advil. I am an Aries so I like to be alert and doing something all the time. I never did anything really physical but I have been up and around a lot.

As of today my Steri-Strips still do not act like they are ready to come off at all. I was told by the nurse to let them peal and just cut them down as they come off. Well this is not happening for me. When I make it to day 21 I will have to try and encourage them to come off. She said for me to take a long shower and get them really wet and try to peal them. I don't know if I am crazy but I am really afraid to take them off. I wish they would just do like they are suppose to do and peal.

This week I have been really sore. When the Dr. took my drains off on Monday she made me promise to leave this ace bandage on for a whole week. Well that means on Monday the 15th I can take it off, but again because of the steri-strips I don't feel comfortable taking it off because it still feels as if I am going to split open. I go back to work on Tuesday the 16th. That is 18 days post op. My job is a very physical one so I asked the doctor for light duty for a while. She gave me a note for light duty until the end of the month. Well I am sure that will work out great for me.

I will be so glad to take this ace bandage off. My incisions do not hurt much they just feel a little tender like a bruise feeling. This ace bandage is a nightmare though. It has made the muscles under my arms ache they almost feel raw. I have put padding all around my underarm but it has not relieved all the pain. I was a good boy though I followed Dr. orders to the letter.

I am a restaurant manager and guess who is coming for a visit to eat breakfast. My surgeon is coming with her family. She is on a diet but she said she is going to let it go for one day so that she can come and eat. I think that is so great! My doctors are great! The name of the restaurant that I work at spells hardening of the arteries.

Here is to looking forward to Monday. 25 years of binders will be no more! :)

Read more...

Unconditional Love

I still remember when I was young, my grandmother was talking about a guy from work. She said that he was a cute little guy. That he use to bring her mail to her every day that he would jump up on her desk. Kind of makes me think of Nanny Fine! Lol! Than she said that one day he left on a trip over seas and when he came back that he was now a she. She still remembers him calling her to meet for lunch. She says that when she saw him that she was wearing a beautiful white dress and was very pretty.

I remember looking at her in amazement and I asked her, "Can girls get changed to boys?". She looked at me very odd and her reply was don't you ever say that again. Now this scared me! I felt like I had really done something wrong.

Well I didn't bring it up to her anymore until I was much older and felt that I could out run her. She listened to me but I really did not get much of a reaction from her. She has brothers and sister that were religious and I am not sure that they would of understood. In the end she stood up for me as if she dared someone to say anything negative about me. When my grandmother passed away she defended me as her grandson. She even sent me a grandson birthday card one year.

I learned a lesson from my family in all the turmoil I went through. They are people too, and they need time to adjust. Especially when they don't understand. I found that for the majority of my family they proved unconditional love and support as far as my TS goes. Now we argue like most families do but it had nothing to do with my gender issues. All and all I will say that my family has been great and they are very happy for me every step of the way.

I am so happy to of had the family that I had and the ones that I still have. My mother passed away in 2006 and she would go after someone with any weapon she could get her hands on if they talked bad about me. Unconditional Love!!

Read more...

Drains Are Gone!

I am so excited! I went for my post-op appointment today. The office was a little behind so I had to wait an extra 30 minutes, but I was not bothered by that. I had been waiting for this surgery all my life and 30 minutes was not going to break me.

When I was finally seen and the doctor says I was doing great. The drainage was down so now she should be able to remove the drains without a problem.

First of all let me tell you, I had watched a youtube video of the drains being removed from a person. Now when the surgeon removed that persons drains they looked all shocked and said "are you done? I didn't feel a thing". I was so relieved because I was so sore I just don't think I could deal with more pain.

Okay now back to today. Well the surgeon had me to lay back on the bed and she took her little scissors and sniped the stitches that hold the drain in place. She said at the count of three and then she pulled it out. OUCH that hurt!!! Well just my right side hurt the left side did not hurt at all just a little burning sensation. Which leaves me to believe that maybe I was just having a little problem with the right side. She told me that the burning was normal that every body had mentioned that before.

When she was done she covered the holes up with gauze and started wrapping that Ace Bandage around me again. What!? I thought I was done with that. Well I have to wear it for one more week just to make sure I don't have anymore fluid build up and to make sure the skin connects to the chest muscle. Okay the 25 year logic once again comes to mind and all is well.

Well my wife took me out to eat to Sweet Tomato and I really enjoyed it. We were going to go see the movie Shutter Island but decided to wait until Friday. I was just really sore. I am sure that after I sleep tonight it will feel much better. It feels like I have been working my upper body out today with weights.

I am getting really tired now so I will go to bed and blog again tomorrow. I am sure I will feel a lot better then.

Read more...

Day Nine A Surprise Text Wonderful North Carolina Doctors

Well I was all blah today with nothing to do. So I just laid around in bed trying to take it easy. Tomorrow being day ten and the day that I go to have my drains removed. That would be 2:30PM. That means I have 21 hours and 47 minutes left from now.

Than it happened that one spark that I did not expect that made my day. My niece text me with some not so great news. She had been in the hospital this weekend having her tonsils and adenoids removed. Here I was complaining about my elective surgery and here she was with a pain I can't even imagine.

We talked on the phone for a while. I had to catch up on what all has been going on in her life. Of course I had to make sure that she heard all about mine. Okay maybe I bored her a little but she was very patient with me.

I look forward to meeting with my doctor tomorrow. I have been so lucky with doctors since I moved to NC. I think for most TS the subject of a doctor is so hard to deal with when you are young. In the past I even sneaked out when the doctor was not looking because he wanted me to take off my shirt.

I was in my thirties before I actually went out on a search to find a doctor. I went through several but then God sent an angel to me. She was such a wonderful doctor she took the time to investigate any of the problems I was having and took care of it. I went to see her almost ten years before she went away to work with another practice. I wanted to follow her but they would not give out the information.

I was totally devastated that I felt like I was going to have to start searching again. A new doctor had come to work in her place and all it was is a blood test I needed so I made an appointment to see him. That was a great decision on my part. He turned out to be just as understanding as my other doctor. So I have been seeing him every since she went away.

When I talked to my doctor about wanting to have a mastectomy and the discomfort these growths has caused in my life. He looked at me in total understanding almost a look of sorry I didn't mention it to you first. Within two days he had me an appointment with a surgeon. I went to meet with her and go through a check up and a mammogram (she was trying to see if we could make insurance pay for it). When the mammogram came back negative she looked at me and said that it would have to be self pay. She cut me a huge discount because it was out of pocket and made it so I could afford it. I ran into a few other obstacles but my surgeon quickly got on the phone and made it all go away. She was fighting for me! I would be surprised if she made any money off of me.

All I will say is thank God for the wonderful and compassionate doctors that are here in North Carolina. If I moved out of state I am certain that I would have to travel back here for my doctor visits.

Read more...

Inanna My Cat

Inanna is the Sumerian goddess of sexual love, fertility, and warfare. She stirs confusion and chaos against those who are disobedient to her. She is also known as the Queen of heaven and earth.

Last April when my wife told me that she wanted to name our new kitten Inanna. I looked at her and said I will never be able to remember that name. With my head cocked to one side I asked where did you come up with a name like that? She said that Inanna was one of her favorite goddesses and that she had that personality. I said okay then but thinking to myself yea that will be changed!

A couple of days ago Inanna went into heat! She has made our life a nightmare!! She meows this very disturbing distressful come take me sound. Well as night fall comes along I look out into the back yard and I can see eyes peering at me from all along the back fence. Oh my they are answering the call!

Inanna is pitching a fit to go outside. She is looking at me like hey I have been calling for them all day so let me out. My wife and I decided okay just one litter and then we will get her fixed. So we let her out and the next thing I know she comes running back in the house spitting and hissing. She did not want a thing to do with them. They even got brave enough to come to the back door but they would not come in. I wouldn't of come in either because Inanna was acting like a rabid crazy cat.

Well we figured she had her chance so we went to bed. Inanna usually sleeps with us but not tonight. Tonight she stayed by the back door. I would say it was about 3 am when she started that sound again. I just got up and let her out and went back to bed. I was suddenly awaken again to the sound of a bad cat fight. I ran to the back to see Inanna come plowing in the back door and a huge ball of cat by the back door fighting. I beat on the door but they would not stop fighting. Finally they stopped and looked up at me. One was a beautiful fluffy orange cat and the other was a fluffy smoke colored cat. I walked out beside the house toward the garden and there I saw another one and it was a big white fluffy cat.

Well last night she went outside and did not come running back in. I looked out back once and I saw the big fluffy yellow cat out there with her. I suppose he won her heart? Doubt it because on the other side of the fence I saw the smoke colored cat. Who really knows but she was out for hours.

Her mood has improved and she is not making that sound as much as before. Or doing those really odd body movements.

Gestation period for a cat is 60 to 67 days. I suppose we will know for sure around May 9th.

Read more...

One Week Post Op

Well today is day seven since my surgery took place. Wow the last two days have been the strangest days. Yesterday I felt more pain than I was use to and today I have felt lots of unexplainable sensations. It bares repeating the drains are causing the most discomfort of all.

I only have two more days to go before I can have these drains removed. I am down to one tbs of drainage so it should not be a problem having these drains removed. I will update after I go to the doctor on Monday. My appointment is at 2:30PM and I just can't wait.

Also today I started back using Ibuprofen for my pain instead of Tylenol. I was told that Ibuprofen thins the blood so I had to stop taking it one week before surgery. A nurse told me on day 4 that I could start taking it again, but I wanted to wait and make really sure. Well today I started taking it and I think I will be able to get away with using it for the duration of my healing.

I got out of the house today for the first time since last Friday. My wife and I went to see premier of Alice in Wonderland in 3D. Now this is the first time I have watched anything in 3D. Lol my wife keep ducking when that little hare kept throwing cups of stuff. It looked just like it was coming for you. I had never read or seen anything of Alice in Wonderland. My wife said it wasn't the actual story, it was different. Well I thought it was a good movie but I would not buy it.

Read more...

Day Six with my two grenades! Jackson and Pratt

Well another restless night of sleep. This is day six and all is well with the surgery site. Its just these two grenade drains that are attached to my body.

I had an allergic reaction while on the Percocet and I had to stop taking it. So I have had to rely on Tylenol since day 3 and it has been tough. I have a bit of tingling at the incision site, but just a plain painful bruised feeling from the drain site. Well as long as all goes okay they will be removed on Monday March 8th. From the looks of it the drainage is tapering off so I am sure that will not be a problem.

For those that don't know: When you have a total mastectomy they insert two drainage bulbs in the wound to drain off excess fluid that accumulates in the site. The name of the drains are Jackson-Pratt must be the names of the inventors. At first it starts off as just blood but as time goes on it turns into a pink color and then clear then if all is well to no drainage. No drainage or less than 2 teaspoons is where I want to be on Monday and I am getting almost clear now.

Well with all this I will just say: A big hole in my theory that I would go to the hospital and have them cut off. That I would get a big band-aid with bacatracin on it and sent home. Really I didn't think it that simple but I really wasn't prepared for all this.

Read more...

The light at the end of a tunnel!

Well here I am a 42 year old FTM. I have live my entire adult life as a man. Also during this time I have worn a binder to hide my chest. This binder has caused me such discomfort. Especially during the summer months I was so hot and it hindered my breathing.

I never thought that I would be able to have a mastectomy because I could never afford to save the money. Well that all changed I found I could afford to have them removed but not afford to save the nipples. Well that was fine by me, because I was not really worried about the cosmetic part only my comfort. I just didn't want to live through another miserable summer. I will finally be able to just wear a tee-shirt.

I had a total mastectomy on Feb. 26th. I am still wearing a binder (for compression), but I will be able to take it off on Monday the 8th. I see the light at the end of the tunnel.

Read more...

Day Three Post Op

 

Well surgery was on March 26th and this picture was taken on Monday the 1st. I know it looks bad now but it will get better in time.

Read more...

A transman from Georgia

Hello World!

Read more...